Are you thinking about what you could’ve said to your friend when they asked you for a favor even when you had your own stuff to deal with? Do you often regret agreeing to do something for someone because your heart isn’t in it? Do you question yourself with “could have said this” and “should have said that” after a conversation?
In today’s world, where everyone seems to be trying to fit in, people often find themselves saying yes to things just because they don’t want to disappoint their peers, family or loved ones. Youtake measures to avoid coming across as a bad person who can’t help a friend. But does it come at the expense of your convenience, comfort and happiness?
While there’s nothing wrong with being generous, many of us often lose sight of the difference between generosity and letting other people walk all over you. Be it your anxieties or fear of disappointing those around you, failing to draw the line between servitude and occasional favors can make you unhappy.
So, what do you do when saying yes seems easier than saying no? Let’s take a look at the importance of standing up for yourself and how you can do it.
The importance of standing up for yourself
Life is too short to let other people dictate everything you do. Here’s how standing up can help you.
It shows you who your real friends are
Occasionally, our friends ask us for favors we’re not sure we want to grant them. Whether you’re saying no because you feel uncomfortable with the favoror simply don’t want to do it, you should always feel comfortable enough to say no—even if it means disappointing your friends; because the truth is, a friend will understand your reasons and still stick with you.
It improves your self-worth
Sometimes caving to peer pressure or sacrificing your own happiness to please someone else can come at a cost. You end up feeling like others don’t value your needs ahead of their own—and as hard as that realization may be, it’s even harder to accept that by prioritizing others’ feelings over yours, you’re diminishing your own self-worth. Hence, by standing up for yourself, you will begin to respect yourself more.
It gives you peace of mind
Knowing that you’re committed to your own happiness is a feeling unmatched by anything—and that’s what standing up for yourself entails. You begin to see the world differently and can chart out your priorities and goals in life.
In addition to that, you will feel a sense of overwhelming self-assurance once you stop holding other peoples’ judgment of you over your head. As such, learning to say no is the first step toward reclaiming your freedom.
How you can stand up for yourself
Here’s how you can begin your journey toward self-love.
Be deliberate with your words
The first step toward speaking up and standing up for yourself is to be clear with your words. If you’ve been asked to do a favor, be gentle but firm with your refusal instead of skirting around the issue and hoping the other person will take the hint.
What’s the harm in being selfish if it’s for the sake of your own happiness? Don’t spend your days helping others fulfill their hopes and dreams by putting yours on hold. Be a little selfish and prioritize yourself when necessary by saying no to favors.
Set boundaries and stick to them
Some people in your life never seem to understand when to stop pressuring you. To maintain those relationships, you must have clear boundaries from the beginning. Make it clear that you won’t tolerate certain actions they take or things they say. Once these boundaries are set, it can become easier for you to stand up for yourself.
Irrespective of these tips, we understand that all this is easier said than done, so it’s okay if you start small—because each step you take toward prioritizing yourself counts!
About the Author
Steve Rizzo is a keynote motivational speaker and an inspirational Hall of Fame speaker who is known for his powerful messages, quick wit and humorous attitude. You can book Steve for your next corporate event today!